Just as women have an eight-lane superhighway for processing emotion while men have a small country road, men have O'Hare Airport as a hub for processing thoughts about sex whereas women have the airfield nearby that lands small and private planes. That probably explains why 85 percent of twenty- to thirty-year old males think about sex every fifty-two seconds and women think about it once a day - or up to three or four times on their most fertile days.
Some comments:
- How did she come up with 52 seconds? That's a startlingly precise figure. How does she know that it's not 53 seconds, or perhaps 51?
- The 15 percent of young men who don't think about sex every 52 seconds must feel rather bad about themselves after reading this passage.
- I feel sorry for anyone - man or woman - who only thinks about sex about four times a day at most. Thinking about sex is kind of fun.
- It's cruel to use O'Hare Airport as a metaphor for sex. After all, everything arrives late there, and people are constantly rushing back and forth in a bad temper. (And the planes are often circling the airport waiting to land. I don't know if I want to take that metaphor any further, thank you.)
- Small country road? Okay, Ms. Brizendine, you may be right, but I'm driving one badass car down that road.
One thing I've noticed about being down is that my brain starts sending me false information: I become convinced, for instance, that many of my friends and all of my casual acquaintances - including any women I am even remotely interested in - really can't stand me but are just being too polite to say so. I've learned to tune this out - especially when events prove that my pessimistic assumptions are wrong. But it does mean that it's hard to sort out what is actually happening in the real world. After all, if you can't trust the data coming from your brain, how do you make correct decisions?