In that spirit, here's a bunch of trivial facts about me, just to let you know who you're dealing with here, and also because I'm self-absorbed as all hell.
- I'm a little over 6'2" now, but I was short when I was growing up: when I started Grade 10, I was 5'4". In public school class pictures, I was always the little kid sitting in the front with his legs crossed.
- I can't touch my toes from a standing position without bending my knees - in fact, I can get about as far as my knees. This is because some tendon or other in my legs is shorter than average.
- Related to the above: I walk funny. I bounce a bit when I walk. It used to be worse, but I went to a physiotherapist a few years ago when I started having trouble with my right knee. I've always wanted to know whether there is a name for this condition, but I've never found one.
- And sitting cross-legged is very comfortable for me. I'm doing it right now, in fact.
- I'm older than I look. When I tell people how old I am, I sometimes have to show them my driver's licence before they believe me. (But I'm starting to go a bit gray now, so this won't last long.)
- My first job was selling tickets at the CNE when I was a teenager.
- My second job was working in the back room at a Consumers Distributing in Leaside. Yeah, I still remember what catalogue number 407-122 was for.
- I only sleep six hours a night. It seems to be all I need. The night before I wrote this, I went to bed at 11:30 and woke up at 5:30.
- Mind you, if I go too long without eating, and then eat a big meal, I inevitably drift out of consciousness for an hour or two.
- I'm allergic to house dust - if a shirt has been hanging in my closet for longer than a couple of months, I have to wash it again before I can wear it.
- I'm also allergic to lawn grass, cats, dogs, penicillin, and about 50% of Mother Nature.
- I can't eat Shreddies or shredded wheat. I won't go into details as to why not.
- I stopped drinking beer a couple of years ago, as I can't seem to handle it too well either. Nowadays, I drink red wine. Usually cheap French red wine - the kind that comes in screw-top bottles. The French probably use this to clean out their car engines.
- Or I drink Scotch.
- I grew up in Don Mills, a suburb of Toronto: the nearest cross streets were Lawrence and the Don Valley Parkway. I spent way too much time as a kid waiting for the Lawrence East 54 bus.
- Because I grew up near an expressway, I like having the sounds of car traffic in the background. I live near an expressway now, and I love it.
- I have a relatively large nose, high cheekbones, and sunken eyes. This means that I have never found a pair of glasses that suits me. But I hate the very idea of contacts. Put things in my eyes? You have got to be kidding.
- Until I was about 27, I could eat absolutely anything I wanted and never gain weight. (When I was a frosh, I once ate something like 14 grilled cheese sandwiches in one sitting.) My metabolism isn't quite as forgiving now. I wish I could drink more chocolate milkshakes.
- My front teeth aren't real: I was hit by a softball when I was 12.
- Except for 2003, I have been unemployed for at least part of every year this century.
- Until a few years ago, I wore size 10 1/2 shoes, until I noticed that I was getting blisters on my feet. Then, I discovered that I needed size 11 1/2 shoes. I still don't know whether my feet grew or got flat or what.
- I need a lot of solitude in order to function. I live alone by choice.
- I've voted every chance I've gotten.
- Politically, I'm mildly lefty - though I'm pragmatic by nature. I distrust all ideologies.
- I'm a third-generation agnostic.
- I'm legendarily bad with tools. (My university roommate once told me, "I thought people like you only existed in books.")
- I hate the sound of whistling. Don't do it around me, please.
- Certain women's perfumes give me sneezing fits. I can tell instantly whether a particular perfume is going to set me off.
- My best 18-hole golf score ever on a regulation-length course is 116. But I once broke 70 on an 18-hole par 3 course. I don't play golf any more.
- I've never broken a bone in my life. But I've had several bad sprains (left little finger, left leg, right ankle, lower back).
- I catch colds very easily.
- I'm a binge cleaner: I get my apartment nice and clean, and then wait a long time before I clean it again. (Right now, I'm at a low point.)
- My hair grows like crazy, especially on the top of my head.
- I could grow a passable beard in about a week. But I hate beards.
- Years ago, when I lived in Kitchener/Waterloo, I forgot where I parked my car, and had to call a cab to go look for it.
- I once had my car stolen and driven to Orillia.
- I last owned a car in 2003.
- I worry a lot. I mean a lot. More than you. I'm a compulsive ruminator.
- I like writing about myself.
- But I'm deathly afraid of boring people. I apologize in advance if I've been boring you, dear reader.